Guest Posting!

Hi everyone!

I'm guest posting over at Sammy Adebiyi's blog today, so come on over and check me out!

SammyA - 3 lies the church taught me

What is being led by the Spirit? - Part 1

I've been thinking a lot today about what it means to walk in the Spirit, or be led by the Spirit on a day by day, hour by hour basis.  The big question for me, is whether it's a one time process that happens when I receive the Spirit, or is it ongoing?  And do we have a choice in whether we are led by the Spirit, or is it automatic because the Spirit of Christ lives in us?

Here are some things I know are true - we don't get "more" of God because we are doing good works - the fullness of Christ dwells in us at the moment we receive Him.  There isn't anything I can do to get more of God, because He's become one spirit with me.  So I have the fullness of God living and dwelling with me.

But, we also know that God gave us the free will to be able to make choices.  So, is my one choice to receive Christ all it takes?  Or do I need to choose, moment by moment, to allow Him to be the dominant force instead of ruling out of my own mind, will, and emotions?

If we're talking about getting to Heaven, yes, it's a once and done deal.  I am Heaven bound because at that moment God literally binds His Spirit to my spirit, and God hates divorce.  But as for actually being led by the Spirit, I honestly think that we have a choice.  The choice doesn't effect our end result - we will be in His presence for eternity whether we choose to be Spirit-led or not - but does effect our lives right now.

Now, this is not a works mentality.  It's not a forced behavior, saying I need to act "right" in order to be pleasing to God, or to get God to love me.  I'm not saying that if you want to receive "x" blessing from God, you need to do "y", and if you don't do it well enough then God won't give you "x".  I lived that life for long enough, believing that somehow we were "purchasing" God's blessings by good behavior, and if we didn't get what the Bible said we would get, then we were messing up, somehow.  It turns God into a vending machine, strips away His power, and puts all the power in the hands of the person.

But, obviously, there are a lot of people walking around this world who know God but are walking around living the same life they always did.  The only evidence of God in their lives is that they go to church on Sunday.  And most of them are hurting - pain from years before, pain from their lives now, hurts and betrayals and anger and frustration.  Fear and depression still reign in their lives
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What is the answer?  How do we help people walk out of sadness and into joy?  A lot of us have though that if we just pretend to be joyful, to have the "joy of the Lord" around other Christians, God will see our attempts and decide that we actually deserve to experience what we are play-acting.  We put on masks and talk "faith" in God for health, joy, peace, love, and all the other things the Bible says we should have because we are Christians.  We say all the right things, we do all the right things, and eventually we burn out, because saying and doing doesn't actually create what we ultimately desire.  I don't want to act loving - I want to experience love.  I don't want to seem joyful to other people - I want to actually feel joy.  I don't want to say I forgive - I want to have the hurts healed internally so that I can mean what I say.

And that's really what we all want - we just don't seem to know how to get it.

So, I've been posing this question to God - how do we access the reality of being led by the Spirit? How do we experience the exchange our ashes for His beauty, our mourning for His joy?  I don't have a fully-formed answer right now - but stick with me for the next few days and we'll see what He reveals.

Counseled By The Spirit

Today I wanted to share an experience I had yesterday during my time writing in my journal.  For me, my journal is the place where I meet with God, my "secret place", if you will.  It's where I both pour out my heart to Him and hear what He has to say, and it's where I pray whatever is on my heart.

For quite a while now I have been trapped in a cycle of resentment and unforgiveness toward someone from my past.  I've blamed them for things that both happened in the past and for things that effect me now, and I have repeatedly forgiven them, (or at least said I forgave them) because the unforgiveness was eating me up inside, and keeping me in bondage to things I just didn't want in my life.  But no matter how many times I tried to forgive them and move forward, I could not rid myself of the resentment I felt.  And every time I would sit down to write the hurt and anger would pour out of me onto the paper, a constant reminder that I hadn't actually successfully forgiven them.

Yesterday, I sat at my computer and wrote, and again, the hurt poured out from my fingers onto the page.  And in the midst of the pain, I cried out to God.  "Lord, please, I can't seem to really forgive this person!  Please help me - I don't want to hold on to this any more!"  And He answered, and His response surprised me - He told me to break an unhealthy soul tie with that person.

Now, if you are anything like me, you've heard a lot about soul ties in relation to sex outside of marriage.  Breaking soul ties, to me, seemed kind of silly, actually.  It had always seemed like something that was a "formula" created by man to give us something we could do to feel like we were free.  It never seemed like it actually did anything.  But by inspiration of Holy Spirit, I did just what He asked - I renounced the soul tie that had formed and thanked Jesus that it was completely broken.

Literally, in an instant, the hurt and anger and resentment that I had held against this person for years was gone.  Just, GONE.  I again forgave this person for the past, and instead of just saying I forgave them, I actually felt forgiveness rise up in me.  I started the prayer one way, feeling like I was never going to be able to let the hurt and anger go, and at the end, was completely free of it all.  Not only was I not holding things from the past against them, I was able to examine the things that had happened and see them with new eyes.  See that those thing which were hurtful had nothing to do with me, or my value.  My worth in God's eyes had nothing to do with this person's treatment of me in the past.

But the funny thing is that I would never have prayed to break a soul tie on my own - it was only though surrendering my own efforts in fixing this situation that I was able to hear what God needed to tell me.  He knew what was needed for me to be free - I did not.  And that makes me wonder, how many situations are we in that Holy Spirit wants to help us out of, but we're too busy trying to fix it ourselves to listen?  I had done what books, pastors and friends had told me to do.  I had forgiven this person, multiple times.  But I did not have the capacity to forgive because of the unnatural bond that had been created years ago, and Holy Spirit knew that once that was dealt with, everything else would fall into place.  But I had to get to the point where I stopped doing what other people told me would fix the situation and instead hear what God was saying.

So, what if we all stop trying to follow the "method" for a moment and really pay attention to what God is telling us to do?  Instead of reading a book that tells me how someone else got their breakthrough, maybe I should ask Holy Spirit to show me what I need to do to get MY breakthrough.  I am really starting to believe that He does know what is best for us, after all. 

Father, I pray today that we have open ears to hear what You are speaking.  I ask that everyone reading be able to hear and respond to what You are telling them to do about every situation in their lives.  I thank you Father, that we can find exactly what we need when we hear Your voice and stop listening to the many voices around us vying for our attention.  I pray for open ears and open hearts for Your people, God.  In Jesus' name, amen.

Individual Gifts and Talents

Today I've been thinking about the charismatic church experience, which is what I'm most familiar with, and something has been highlighted to me by Holy Spirit which I never quite saw this way before.  Here's the scripture that got me started down this road:

"Just as our bodies have many parts and each part has a special function, so it is with Christ’s body. We are many parts of one body, and we all belong to each other. In his grace, God has given us different gifts for doing certain things well. So if God has given you the ability to prophesy, speak out with as much faith as God has given you. If your gift is serving others, serve them well. If you are a teacher, teach well. If your gift is to encourage others, be encouraging. If it is giving, give generously. If God has given you leadership ability, take the responsibility seriously. And if you have a gift for showing kindness to others, do it gladly." -Romans 12:4-8

We are each part of the body of Christ.  We each have special gifts and talents, and we each need to be equipped to fulfill our particular role.  We are not supposed to fulfill the same role many times over, we are each called to be something different from anyone else around us.  We say we understand this, and yet how much of the time are we comparing ourselves to each other?  We see someone touched at the altar and think that they have something that we don't have because they fell down under the anointing of the Spirit and we didn't.  Or they gave a word in tongues and interpreted during a church service and we've never done that, so we think they are some how better than we are, more loved by God, more anointed, etc.  We think that in order to be more valuable in the Kingdom of God we need to do what someone we look up to is doing.

And yet, in this passage of scripture, some of the gifts listed don't seem that impressive.  Prophesy, yes, that's something we all want and go after.  But serving others?  Like, offering to clean the church, or working in the kitchen, or watching the babies while their parents are in the main church service?  Encouraging others?  Giving? Showing kindness?  How are these important gifts? We don't see them as having value in the Kingdom of God because they seem too easy.  Out of the list of 7, we only think there is true honor in 3 of them: prophesy, teaching, and leadership, and somehow we think we have to fit ourselves into one of these 3 or we're not being effective for the Kingdom of God.  We all think in order to really do something for God we need to be a leader in some way.  We need to fall into one of the 5-fold ministry positions.  Usually the first thing someone who's on fire for God wants to do is go into full-time ministry.

Where did this idea come from?  Certainly not from God, because here equal value is placed on all the gifts, even those gifts that we think are easy, like encouraging others, or giving.  We have equated being effective for God as standing up in front of people.  You've "made it" if you've got a pulpit from which to speak.  But I don't need a pulpit to be a giver.  I don't need to pulpit to encourage others.  I don't need a pulpit to be kind to the people around me.  And apparently, to God, those gifts are just as vitally important as being a leader or a prophet.

So the question then is, when are we going to start valuing each other for what gifts and talents we are bringing to the Body of Christ?  And when are we going to see the value in ourselves?

*Not a Real Post

This isn't a real blog post.  Today has been fairly busy - I had mentoring class this morning and then when I got home this afternoon my kids have been at each other (summer boredom comes around fast!), so I haven't had much time to gather my thoughts.  I figured I'd just get on and tell you about what I'm pondering about with God today, because that is as organized as it's going to get.

1. What does it really look like to stand in faith?
2. What does spiritual maturity really look like?
3. How do we maintain our connection with God even when things get chaotic in our lives?
4. How do we continue to support one another when prayers go unanswered?

I'm hoping that perhaps tomorrow I'll have something to say about at least one of these topics, because right now my thoughts are too muddled!

God Isn't Repelled By Sin

I spend time pondering things, and one thing that has been on my heart is this: how we teach that God could have nothing to do with sin, so He sent Jesus for His sake, so He could accept us again.  Jesus, God in flesh, came into a depraved, sinful world.  He did not sin, but sin was all around Him, and He loved those who were still lost in their sin.  But if God could have nothing to do with sin, then why could He come in flesh into a world full of it?  And love those people?  Because if Jesus really was the express image of the Father, He is showing us that the Father loved us when we were full of the sinful nature and committing sin. Which of course it says in John 3:16.

Therefore, I don't think it was the Father that could have nothing to do with sinful people - it was sinful people who could have nothing to do with the Father, because His goodness in the midst of our depravity highlighted to us just how depraved we really were, and with that understanding came much shame, judgement, and condemnation of ourselves.  We saw just how filthy we were when we were in the midst of that kind of love and goodness.  No matter how much God loved us and desired to forgive us, He knew that we would always see ourselves filthy and ugly and naked and ashamed unless He gave us the right to see ourselves as fully forgiven, fully redeemed, fully holy, fully righteous.  We would not be able to forgive ourselves even if He forgave us - we would not be able to receive His forgiveness without a sacrifice.  And so He came - God on earth, as a man, the only one able to completely fulfill all the Law and redeem man from his own guilt and shame.  I think the price that Jesus paid wasn't to satisfy God - I think it was to satisfy us.  And how loving is that?  That God would do something for us that He didn't require for Himself.  He did this all for us.  And that, that right there, is what His Love is all about.

He came and gave of Himself not for His own benefit, but for ours, so that we could see ourselves as children of God instead of children of wrath.  So that when the enemy came and told us how awful and filthy and no-good we were, we could look at the point of the Cross and say with confidence "You are wrong - I am not those things because of what Jesus did for me.".  Jesus hanging on the cross is a picture of the love of God in action.

Father, thank you for loving us so much.  Thank you for the Jesus coming and giving us the right to see ourselves as You see us.  Open up our eyes to see just how loved we really are by You.  In Jesus' name, amen.

God Didn't Screw Up

Here's something I just wrote in my journal:

"Trying to make yourself into someone you are not is like telling God He screwed up when He created you."

Over the last week or so Holy Spirit has really been focusing on the fact that Christians are not meant to be a homogeneous group of people.  We are not meant to fit into a mold of the "mature Christian" and all act, talk, walk, and look alike.  And yet the church has been trying to get us to all "fit the mold" for ages.  We look at the pastor, or elders, or someone held in high esteem in our local assembly, and think that we should just be more like them.  They say they matured in God because they got up early at 4 am and read their Bible and prayed for 3 hours before work, and we have one of two reactions.

Reaction #1 - "I want to be like elder so-and-so, so if they grew to maturity by doing this, then I'm going to do it too!"  

Reaction #2 - "I can't get up and spend 3 hours reading the Bible and praying.  I'll NEVER be able to have as close a relationship with God as elder so-and so!"

In both reactions we see maturity in God reduced to a formula - elder so-and-so did "x" and got "y" result.  Therefore, if I do exactly what they did, I will get exactly what they got, and if I do not, I will not.  We also see limited, worldly thinking, in that we are limiting God to doing things only one way, because that's the way that worked for someone else.  

The other thing that I see in this type of reasoning is that we tend to take someone else's experience and allow it to carry more weight than what God is speaking to us.  We take something someone else did under inspiration of Holy Spirit, and make it into a formula that will work for anyone.  Then if the formula doesn't work for us, we wonder what we did wrong, instead of understanding that we are all created to be different.

I have done this for years.  Literally.  I limited my relationship with God because I thought that to really get close to Him and and walk in unity with Him I needed to do x,y, and z, and if I couldn't make those things happen, then I was out of luck.  I thought I needed to do all these things in a certain way, whether those things worked in my life or not, or God would withhold part of Himself from me because I wasn't doing it "right".

The other thing I've fallen prey to is thinking that the people of God are all supposed to be outgoing, friendly, talkative, bold extroverts who are happy all the time and want to be going and doing for God all the time.  Are there some people who absolutely are this way?  Sure!  But when you are a shy, quiet, smart introvert and your only example of people on fire for God are bold extroverts, it's really easy to think that you are broken, or that you just need to pretend in order to be effective for God.  It's really easy to hate who you are because you are not able to make yourself into someone different.  It's also really easy to be jealous and envious of those people for whom being extroverted is natural.  Especially since there is such a push to go out and evangelize the world, which to most of us means going out and doing things that most introverts are VERY uncomfortable doing.  

But I'm coming to realize that if we are called to be parts of the Body of Christ, we each have an individual part to fill.  We each have our part to play, and we each have something that we contribute, whether we are a people-person or a book nerd, whatever our personality or home life, no matter what circumstances we find ourselves in.  God is with us, and willing to reveal to us where we fit, if we just stop looking to others for answers and look to Him.  Holy Spirit will teach us not only who we are in Christ, but what we need to do to grow in Him, and what Christ looks like in US.

Father, I just ask for everyone reading today to get a fresh revelation of who You created them to be, and how You will use their gifts, talents, and abilities to transform the world around them.  I thank you Father that there is no one way, there are no limitations on You, and that You will work in our lives as we seek You.  In Jesus' name, Amen.

*I apologize if this seems scattered today - I was having a difficult time getting the thoughts from my mind to the page, probably because I mostly likely could write a book on this subject!